The Last WIW

So in January I started a Biggest Loser contest.  I figured it'd be some good motivation and I figured right.  I didn't really keep up with the fb group because it (as usual) started to get weird.  So today, after 19 weeks, I went for the final weigh in.  And by went in I mean I worked out, came home, got naked, peed as many times as I could (yeah I tried for a #2, failure) and thennnn weighed myself.

It only took me like 15 weeks to paint my toes.

• I lost a total of 22.9 lbs. 
• My BMI went from 28.5 to 24.5.  Which is considered "normal weight."
• I'm happier and prouder of myself than I have been in a while (this one's my favorite).

I kinda wonder what it was like before all of this.  Before I started exercising and giving a shit about what I ate.  Before I felt like I was held accountable for things.  Before I realized that how I felt about myself was directly related to how much I sweated and what I put in my body.  It's hard to think back and be able to identify with that person or to feel sorry for myself back then.  I'm not sure how I let it get to where it did or what made me go there.

I guess either way you look at it, it's a vicious cycle.  Whether it's a negative one or a positive one.  Back then, it was most certainly a negative one, and when I started to exercise and see results and feel better about myself it turned into a positive one.  It turned into wanting to go to the gym.  It turned into wanting to buy cute workout clothes because I felt like I could.  It turned into wanting to keep challenging myself because I realized exactly how much I was capable of.

I still don't think I look good in a swimsuit.  My stomach still jiggles when I brush my teeth.  I most definitely don't think I look sexy as fuck naked (see below, those are ecard words, not mine).  But I do FEEL good.  I feel confident, happy and holyshitohmygoshsometimes sexy (that one's few and far between).  So even though I'm not winning an autographed Mama Laughlin picture (yeah that's one of the prizes for the contest), I still feel like I won (<-- I'm a douche).  I'm glad I participated and I don't think I'll be visiting the scale quite so often anymore, but I'm happy to have been held accountable!

This is a lie. I exercise for both those reasons.

How can you challenge yourself?  Can you hold yourself accountable?